Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Chapter 1 - The Declaration

Trip to Mars - Indian Curry Style!

It's 2nd January, 2047; 15th of August would complete 100 years into India's Independence and the government of India wants to surprise the world on this occasion! A highly secretive mission is on the way to completion....and the president of India, 'Dr. Rajmohan Shah' has to do the honours of making it public!
There is a particular gait (with a limp) which Dr. Rajamohan has, as he walks towards the stage to break the news; some people think that it is his royal lineage and style which makes him walk like that, but truth was he had an upset stomach caused by eating excessive chicken curry during lunch. He was walking that way to avoid farting loudly! The whole country waits with bated breath as Dr. Rajmohan Shah walks (rather limps) to his virtual holographic podium (everything is virtual in that era as it saves time, money and resources). Finally, he reaches the podium and roars - 'We are going to MARS!'
There is a loud applause in the Parliament and celebration wrecks across the country!
Dr. Rajmohan gives out a broad smile and enjoys the reaction of shock and awe among the dignitaries! (During the applause, gasps, yelling...Dr. Rajamohan passes his fart, as he knew no one could hear the sound of his fart in this commotion)
The shock of the news (and not the fart) could be felt even in the White House! President of the United States (She had many Firsts to her credit - the first Woman President of USA, the first President of USA of African Origin, the first President of USA who had a sex change done to be a woman etc) thinks aloud, how the hell did they do it? We took 70 years to master the abilities to send a human to deepspace; 40 deaths (of cosmonauts) and 100 billion $ later we managed to successfully send a human to mars and get him back in one piece (although he had turned into a psycho!). How the hell, did they manage to make a deepspace program right under our very noses and even manage to develop complex technologies for human survival in deepspace?! Forget one human, they are sending a whole dozen of goddamn astronauts to mars!
I want a report on this project RIGHT NOW!!!she yells at the Head of FNCBSIIA ! (USA had finally got the CIA, FBI and NSA to merge, cause they had started fighting internal wars with each other; so now its called - Federal National Central Beureau of Security Intelligence & Investigative Agency)

3 comments:

agnishul said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Strange_Currencies said...

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh... dude. From my heart... it was hilarious. the words were ... spot on, great writing great really great.... i'm still laughing and awe at those vocab..... you got those "thing". i would love to read more. How did you get those FBI and CIA to merge?????

Unknown said...

Too Good dude. Very good humor and a great imagination. I just got spell bound. Too good.