Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Chapter 5 - Operation Chicken Curry

The RAW agents had enough information to stop the sabotage attempt on Operation Mangal (Indian Mars Mission), as they had recorded the entire conversation in 'The Rendezvous' between 60 Cents, L.F.H.Noodal and P.Pervez on a Tape using a 2in1 Tape Recorder which was connected to one of the 40 Mics installed over there. (by the way the Tape Recorder was gifted to Abbas Bhai on the day of his marriage by his in-laws as dowry). The next step was to nab the moles buried deep inside the Parliament - the power center of India. The Chief of RAW was Ayyo Swami Sriranganathan...in short ASS!(a Top Ranking IPS officer and a lover of Sambhar Vada & Curd Rice with Nimboo Achhar) ASS calls upon his team for a conference to discuss the grim issue of the foreign powers colluding to sabotage Operation Mangal. Not only that, he wanted to root out all the moles in the Parliament, Judiciary, Police, Army etc etc. He had given the job of uprooting and arresting the moles in our country to Inspecter Sulabh Sandas. Sulabh was supposed to give a report on the arrests made and action taken during this meeting. Everyone takes their seat including Mr.ASS only to find one chair empty which belonged to Inspector Sulabh Sandas. Mr.ASS speaks (in Madrasi accent), "Today, YIndia yas ya democrAAtic naytion yis yapproachinga the mYlestone yof success..we needa to do whAAt yever yit takesa to protecta yita! by the by..where is sulabh sandas?". one of the officer replies, "Sir! it is on the first left towards the end of the corridor!"; Mr.ASS retorts, "No you Khakhi dumbhead, I yam nAAt talking about Sulabh Sandas Shouchalya (toilet) but I yam talking about Inspector Sandas!". The police officer replies, "Oh!! Sir, Inspector Sandas is on his way..I believe, he has had some substantial success in nabbing the moles in the Parliment!"; as soon as he finished his statement, Inspector Sandas (a big moustached and pot bellied Inspector) enters the conference room with a huge cardboard box.All senior police officers, IPS officers and Mr.ASS stand up with astonishment; without wasting even a moment, Mr.ASS looks towards Sandas and asks, "What is that you bring in this box?"; Sandas replies, "Sir! with all due respect, I deserve a promotion for what I am about to show you plus an increment in my salary and a 1 year license from you for taking bribe from everyone I come across!". Mr.ASS said, "Good! I am happy that you are speaking with so much confidence, I am sure you must have done a great job of the orders that I gave you! your demands would be taken into consideration by our entire panel, but hey you must share 20% of the bribe with me ok?? as I need money to buy a 2 BHK flat in idlivadapuram!"; "Ok Sir! Sure" said the Inspector and opens the cardboard box and empties the content on the table! To the horror of everyone watching, there was a huge mountainous pile of dead moles, rats, bandicoots and other rodents! Mr.ASS shouts, "What the F***!!!! is this some kinda joke!!!!", Sandas says, "Sir, you only asked me to catch all the moles in the parliament, I have not only caught all of them, I have arrested and killed the rats and bandicoots too! I thought you would be happy about it!!!". Mr. ASS shouts, "Take this Sandas and flush him out! before I do an encounter of him!!".
"Mr.ASS!", continues a police officer, "this was a bad start to 'Operation Chicken Curry'! Now what do we do?". ASS replies, "Well! I am appointing an 'Ace' to do this job for me...he is an IPS topper and a very capable young lad..also known for his brutal interrogation methods and tendency to do an encounter; his name is....ACP Screw Singh!...although Inspector Sandas is an idiot, but he has a huge local intelligence network and is quite useful in getting difficult things done; I am sure ACP Screw Singh can work with him quite effectively"

2 comments:

Prityush said...

HAHAHAHA! Inspecter Sulabh Sandas! man how are you thinking of all this?? are you making this up or copying from elsewhere?

Strange_Currencies said...

....."YIndia yas ya democrAAtic naytion yis yapproachinga the mYlestone yof success"....... this is bonker.... never read a south Indian accent like this before.... and ..... what.. Inspector Screw Singh, Man you score big time.... Loving it